Friday. Cold. Miserable. No money. Bollocks.

I feel like crap. After lessons last night, I rather stupidly went out and got drunk. It didn't make me feel any better about my predicament, unsurprisingly. I just sat in the Cooper's Arms, supping beer and failing dismally to complete an Auracaria crossword. Somebody else in there must have been depressed too: The juke box was playing Tracy Chapman, REM and other sad stuff. After arriving home about 11.30, I found Wife and Child curled up asleep in the latter's bed. I cracked open a bottle of Korean rice wine that one of my students had given me. Not bad. Nur woke up, and we talked and smoked in the kitchen. Her elder sister, the cow, has still not told their father about their mum's condition: She wants Nur to tell him when she arrives in Istanbul. She isn't even looking after him, preferring to focus all her attention on her mother, even while the poor man screams in pain and desperation. They have been married for soemthing like 50 years, since they were children (a common village practice in Turkey until relatively recently).
God, life just seems to be throwing me curve balls at the moment. I NEED TO BE STRONG FOR MY FAMILY'S SAKE. But where can i get that strength? I'm on my knees as it is. Someone help me find a way through all this, please!