An advertisement for a course....
SNAKE HEAD ENGRISH
Unit 5, Block 12, Shaolin Road, Fujian Province, PRC
�HEY YOU! YEAH, YOU NEW GENEERATION! COME ON, DREAM IN ENGLISH ON ENGLAND!�
Coarse detail for that week:
Monday: PAY DAY: You pay $20,000, we get you to ENGLAND!!!! Then you pay more. Or, we torture you granny. You arrive in UK in back of led roll�rel loll�big truck and go straight to wonder home: converted freight container!! You share with only 42 other!!! 1th lesson: Vocabulary: Theme: �Cutting vegetables in farm�
Tuesday: Glammer! 1st conditional: �If you no work 24 hour day, seven day week, shining Samsung miclowave, we will tear you pet budgie head off!
Wednedsday: Social Engrish: Getting a National Insurance number. We give you one, then you sign contract promising you work for next ten year. Or we burn you house to ground.
Thuday: Visit to factory!! Depart 4.30 a.m. Bring own lunch. We take you in special no-window white van. You stay in factory, learn great ever day English, as, �Oi you! Pick that up!�, �I think �1 is fair wages for a twelve-hour day�, �No, it doesn�t hurt, I can carry on working, look, I�ve put it back in the socket�. Stay in factory until 12.00 o�clock p.m. midnight!! You work! Or we get Ming Dynasty on you parents!
Fliday: OUTING and CULTURE STUDIES: go swimming and cockle picking in loverly MORECAMBE BAY!!! Note: you must pick 300 bags cockles or we shoot you family!!!!!
SNAKEHEAD ENGRISH ! YEAH! YOU HAVE GREAT FUNNY TIME AND ENTERTAINING! BECAUSE, WE GREAT ENJOYMENT MAKE! OR YOU DIE!!!
OK, so perhaps it's in poor taste, considering what happened to those poor guys on Morecambe Bay, but it's nothing compared to the parasitic arrogant pondlife that engineered the tragedy.
No comments:
Post a Comment