I should be in bed, letting my poor arm heal, yet here you find me, hours away from the new year, eating a cracker, drinking a G&T, and blogging one-handed. I'm feeling frustrated because of the arm, and also a little angry: it seems a neat summation of my year, actually. Looking back at my blog, it appears to have started with all good intentions, then fizzled out gradually. Sometimes I wonder if this isn't a summation of my life as a whole - frustration, anger, promise, disappointment.
However, it would be wrong to say that I actually feel anything negative in general right now. Instead, I feel, well, just feelings: a desire to wallow in the now, and exult in the ability to do so. Yes, there are worries and difficulties ahead, but I know that they are surmountable. I know that there are still many weeks of pain and inconvenience ahead of me, yet pain is a thing of temporary duration ultimately, as are, bluntly, all those sensations we either cherish or seek to avoid. Simply what is now is what needs to be lived through: And knowing that that which pains me will soon be past, and that which pleasures me is either now, or will be soon, or glows in my mind, how can I do anything other than exult?