Wednesday, February 21, 2007
What was it?
Maybe it was having to tell a colleague, for the umpteenth time, how to install a printer on his computer, and knowing that I'll have to tell him again any time soon; Maybe it was having to pack all the stuff on my desk up, because they were moving my desk nine inches to the right and were worried about Health and Safety; maybe it was the second call from the exams officer, who couldn't work out a perfectly clear spreadsheet as to who should be put in for exams and when, because she couldn't be arsed to understand timetables; Maybe it was when one of my colleagues shoved her oar in, and started telling all and sundry that exams would be on days they weren't going to be; maybe it was another colleague who has studiousuly ignored the list of people who wish to sign up for a course, then called them to say that the course had been cancelled due to lack of demand; Maybe it's the colleagues who have had a go at me because of other people's incompetencies; Maybe it was the sense that I feel I have been marginalised and sidelined, both professionally and socially, for reasons that I don't understand; Maybe it was the realisation that the 'pay increase for sustained contributution to the university' has nothing to do with sustained contribution at all, but rather the number of letters after your name, another kind of box-filling, and the convictio that I am not paid as much as I deserve; Maybe it was the realisation of just how much I have contributed, and how little support I've actually received; Maybe it was this or that or the other, or an aching sense of loss; But I just realised, I really don't give a shit any more, and I am utterly sick of clearing up other people's crap for them. If people are so desirous of drowning in their own incompetence, then so be it. They deserve to drown. What I will no longer let them do is drown me alongside them. It is noticeable how, in any given organisation, the most competent are loaded up with work until they become functionally incompetent.